Sunday, February 10, 2008

Debating the minimums..

Recently the Indian Law Commission headed by A R Lakshmanan decided that the minimum age for marriage for the men (too) will be reduce to 18 years. Also along with that it was decided that minimum age for consensual sex will be set at 16 years.

So here we are, this now raises a million and a half questions.

1. Why simply change it from 21 years?
2. Consensual sex… what the hell does that mean?
3. Ain’t 18 years a little too young for the present age father or mother?
4. Should we have had separate laws considering that child marriage makes sense to only fewer section (differentiated regarding culture, rural, urban or geographical) of people today?
5. What do you think is the ‘appropriate’ age for marriage and sex?

Though presumably my answers or rather views, it will be harmful only to you if you consider it harmful :P

So, Why Simply change it from 21 years?

Since India is a republic that is enrolled in every other, some times non consequential, human rights organization. Which also includes UN ones. They have to abide by something called rights to equality, in this case ‘sex’. So men and woman should not have different laws, cool by me, But is it pragmatic in a predominantly patriarchal society to have same rules for both the sex. But then I ponder over the law and find that’s its just a law to set the minimums, not the compulsories. So that’s that if you have been through your 18 years, u are ready to get married.

Then, Consensual sex… what the hell does that mean?

Thinking like a virgin 23 year old guy, consensual sex is rather a redundant phrase. So what does consensual sex mean? whose permission do we (ahem) need to take before having sex? The law commission says that other than having the permission of those involved, they have to be above the age of 16 years. And hence, even though you have been married before the age of 16 years (socially might have been accepted, but still illegal) you are barred from having sex (again leagally). But there is a catch, the minimum age according to Child marriage act is 15 years and according to A R Lakshmanan law commission any matrimonial where the involved is below the age of 16 will be considered void. Hello?? Can somebody have CVS incorporated in the bars ( and no I am not talking about spirits) .

Now, Ain’t 18 years a little too young for the present age father or mother?

Ok so in this exponentially growing economy of india, can a family where the ‘girl’ and ‘boy’ in their teens survive? Even Rakhi sawant can answer that. NO. but then why set a minimum when it absolutely doesn’t make sense.
Then I see the big pictures, what about say a traditional marwadi family selling saaris in avenue road in Bangalore. I can (though not completely convinced) somehow make sense of the number 18. Then I catch the drift or rather the problem of the law commission which makes them set the minimum to 18.
I feel the govt. has more work on their sleeves than just simply setting minimums or maximums. They got to take the awareness programmers to a completely new high and make the people in the slums realize that just getting your daughter or son married isn’t helping your situation and make the poor from the rich cities to see the big picture.

This brings us to, Should we have had separate laws considering that child marriage makes sense to only fewer section (differentiated regarding culture, rural, urban or geographical) of people today?

We all are aware about how it’s of cultural significance or rather cultural pigeon holes to get the girl child married once they reach their teens. But today, it makes sense only to a selected community of parents. So assuming that a bangalorean or for that matter any cosmopolitan city’s laws should be different compared to say jeypore in Orissa or Bikaner in Rajasthan. Simply, because the amount of modern city demons one has to face is much more. So we need more ‘astra’ to fight them and hence higher minimum age??

But having different laws for different region is ridiculous especially the human rights related ones. But the government will have to rely on the presumably higher street smartness (big city common sense) of a city lad or lady.

And finally, What do you think is the ‘appropriate’ age for marriage and sex?

If u ask me this question I would say after 26 and 18 (subject to availability, sadly ) respectively. Simply because I feel this age of infinite growth possibilities will ask for much higher requirements to satisfy the next generation (our children) and hence having the ‘astra’ is very important. Minimum one degree of credibility and a bank balance good enough to support a family of 4 (mom, dad, wife and you) to ask the least.

And regarding sex…. [smilies]

11 comments:

Jayanth said...

this whole marriage age issue is a mute point, its primarily targeted towards the illiterate and poor section who will not follow these and the educated are knowledgeable enough to do the sensible..

Darkness and deep said...

@jammy just because its a mute point from our perspective we cant sit claiming nothings gonna come out of it...

Golf Oscar Delta said...

dude all i can say i as long as men make laws there will always be other men to break them.

to repeat the age old crap : Only solution is education man.

As for ages it doesnt really matter man: as long as a couple realizes what they have ahead of them it doesnnt matter whether they marry or mar each other, or for that matter even 'do it'.... again educate them....

btw....its a bloddy good blog

Jayanth said...

i gave two perspectives, one of the uneducated- who do it no matter what, and the other of the educated to whom you don't need to preach about these issues

Somebody said...

An intellectual dissertation.. There was a clamor about 'Uniform Civil Law' during NDA regime. Today, we definitely have different laws for different religions, i.e Hindu Marriage Act is significantly different from that of Muslims and Christians.

Darkness and deep said...

@p : education is the solution for more than one thing, govt. has done a lot and social groups have done much more about 'educating' the poor, but for some reason they have not had satisfying results.
@jam: dude, finally i see two divides, educated and non educated. but i am sure the father and sons companies run by many in rajastan, bihar etc have got something right. I keep bringing up this group is because these guys are known to get married at 18 -21 years and still manage a good life.
@keth :Regarding separate marriage laws, they better have it different cause u are not going to make justice by unifying a hindu a muslim and a christian law.

anupsu said...

hmm..hmmm..hmm...

Question. Why do lots of poor families hav infinite kids and why do they get married so early?

Answer : Becos more ppl means more people earning.

All good, if you're myopic. In the long run it hurts the economy and the poor people end up suffering again.

but who cares about the big picture. We ourselves are guilty of indulging in things that give us momentary pleasure but are bad in the long run.

So education alone is not the issue here. Even educated poor people with no jobs will end up doing the same thing. The Govt. needs to do something about the economy and cost of living too.

Independently, these laws are useless. So, what's the solution?

I think the Govt. needs to come up with strict laws such as only 1 child per family or something(like China). and enforce it with an iron fist. This is the only solution i see.

Mojo Rising said...

Hmmm.... This post is sure to get a lot of attention.

Nice Analysis

Age of conset.... 26... Man just because we did'nt get some that does'nt mean no one under 26 should get some... (ask dheeraj) he might say 12.....

23 year old virgin.... Great man.. It takes lots of guts to admit on your blog that you are still a VIRGIN.... hmmm but that might again work in your favour.... The Pity and "new and unused" factor might work well with some chicks.

Appropriate time for sex.... ANYTIME man... If you ask me we had it right in the stone age or the middle ages... like ROME... you like some one... just whip it out and go....

FUCK overpopulation, FUCK global warming... Free love is what we need... if people could fuck all the time then everyone would be too busy to wage war and pollute the earth.....

Darkness and deep said...

@mojo - who the hell are u?

Safari Al said...

Look, being the 22 year old virgin that I am, I'd just rather have some law that says being single is not good.

Controlled pro-creation is what we need. That and better and more durable condoms.

DJ said...

ye mojo saale ko free love chahiye...!!! i guess his house is the right place to look for free love... but people dont have balls ..... they just want that ki girl should herslef strip in front of them and they dnt have to do nyhtng....
u should make a move buddy..!!! :)
and ya about consensual sex is sex apart from forced sex... :)
and i dnt think this changing the minimum is going to make a change..
you are quite right to make a change.. they need to create awareness among people.. who dont knw anythn abt these laws...bcz for the educated people.. anyway.. they knw all the things.....
:)