Friday, December 22, 2006

Confessions Of A Progrmming 'baay'

It was 2003, I was pretty amused at my AIEEE rank and was happy that I would at least manage chemical engg. seat in my coll. But as it turned out I actually got a mechanical seat. But not without any ‘hullah’ made about how I just missed a computer seat(just by one rank).

The ghosts of that day still haunt me. Finally I faired pretty well in my mechanical engg.(touch wood, I still have a sem left). But preferred to get placed in a software company. This is because I thought myself to be some one with more programming skills than spanner rotating mechanical skills.

I got placed in Epsilon and thought ‘fine now that I have got placed in a software company, I should be able to feel more comfortable’. But life is never consistently fair, I now realize how tough this actually can be. Programming is not only applying an algorithm alone, its much more than that.

CGI, APACHE, DATABASE… ghanta they have any algos, they are all bloody fucking fundaes that I have to suddenly mug up so that I can make sense of the programs I write.

Yeah, yeah they are interesting but what the fuck I have to learn all that in 5 days.

They reason I suddenly felt the anger rising up my spine is because I suddenly feel ‘inappropriate’ to the software industry.

May I grow faster than the million technologies that are made every day. I AM HERE TO STAY!!!

Monday, December 18, 2006

Funny things u should do in a lift

I know this is stupid, but its full porrikki... (got as mail)

1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.
22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.