Chris Rocks!!

"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in NBA is Chinese, The Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon'."

Love of a loveless

love is in the air!!
very strange, very very strange.. Its valentines day and coincidentally i am feeling love sick. I assure you its not anything to do with the day. i am just feeling love sick. may be i need one now.

But who. they say she will come, and u will talk, and u will connect, and u will fall in love. I have waited. I have have taken many trains on the one way route. But nothing happened, there was no connection, She is not there anywhere in the horizon. But, I want to fall in love with her.

I cry for company of a woman. Not the same way i cried the first time, no not infatuations, nothing sexual. I cry for a company, but for some reason I want that to be a girl. I want to talk to her about intuitions, aliens, constellations, food, love, music, movies, job, science, conspiracy theories, parents, friends.I want to listen to her talk, talk her heart out. I want to feel her aura, feel her voice, feel the dew on hair, feel her perfume.I want to fall in love.

I want to connect. I always picture it like a tube connecting her with me. It glows, glows bright. Bright with love. But cant see her face. Its hazy up there, but it didn't matter then. But now i want it to be real. I want to see the face and hear her. I want to fall in love with her.

But Who??

Prejudice and Underestimation

Dreams, interesting things they are. I feel there are two types of dreams. One, those that are really arbit and seem to you like a motion picture, complete with sub plots and main plots, a hero (usually you), a heroine (usually her) and the extras. The other is ofcourse the one that all the great people talk about. “I have a dream” said ML king. Yes that DREAM-the one that can get you the car, the girl, the comfort, the trip to Egypt, the chick in the movie. Yes that dream, the dream that most of us live our lives for.

There was this self help book that I was reading once that said it’s the worst crime to die with the dreams remaining dreams. When I was in my 3^rd standard, my father used to tell tales of my dadu who was the only doctor in the whole Burdwan district in west Bengal. And about how famous he was and how he rode his white horse, chetak. What else do you expect from a small child listening to such wonderful tales. Yes that’s when I thought that my “future” is in curing people. I had to become the doctor!! (the exclamation is for

me)

And then it was software engineer, and sadly the only reason I thought I wanted to become one was because everyone one around me was one and belting money out of it. Not only that one person went all the way to New Zealand with that job. Now New Zealand was one of the foreign locations I always imagined myself with her in my other type of dreams. So obviously I had to become a software engineer!!

Engineering happened. I moved out of home, hostel happened. There I was suddenly hit by my real future. I had not become the doctor. I had taken mechanical engineering, software not happening too. So what now, automobile engineer or aeronautical (what else did u expect from me). That’s what I thought I was going to become a good mechanical engineer and serve the industrial world!!

I am placed in a software company. And I am now planning to become a restaurateur. I want to protect this dream of mine. Really do. I am really scared that this will turn out the way my other dreams have. I am scared. But this one is a dream of a older person. A dream that has grown a lot. A dream that has had similarities to the first type ( the hero is a restauranter ). Please god help me protect it.

As Will smith says “u have a dream, protect it, nurture it, till it becomes true”.. pursuit of happyness.

And yeah about the heading, I dont like it(them) it either!!!

dadu- grandfather

Confessions Of A Progrmming 'baay'

It was 2003, I was pretty amused at my AIEEE rank and was happy that I would at least manage chemical engg. seat in my coll. But as it turned out I actually got a mechanical seat. But not without any ‘hullah’ made about how I just missed a computer seat(just by one rank).

The ghosts of that day still haunt me. Finally I faired pretty well in my mechanical engg.(touch wood, I still have a sem left). But preferred to get placed in a software company. This is because I thought myself to be some one with more programming skills than spanner rotating mechanical skills.

I got placed in Epsilon and thought ‘fine now that I have got placed in a software company, I should be able to feel more comfortable’. But life is never consistently fair, I now realize how tough this actually can be. Programming is not only applying an algorithm alone, its much more than that.

CGI, APACHE, DATABASE… ghanta they have any algos, they are all bloody fucking fundaes that I have to suddenly mug up so that I can make sense of the programs I write.

Yeah, yeah they are interesting but what the fuck I have to learn all that in 5 days.

They reason I suddenly felt the anger rising up my spine is because I suddenly feel ‘inappropriate’ to the software industry.

May I grow faster than the million technologies that are made every day. I AM HERE TO STAY!!!

Funny things u should do in a lift

I know this is stupid, but its full porrikki... (got as mail)


1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.
22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.

Prem Doot

I don't know why i am doing this, but somethings are worth done than left undone. I am in love with you and i cant help myself from denying it. I know this is a very wrong thing to do knowing that you are already engaged with someone. The pain of love untold is growing everyday. Unbearable.
Weighing down things it looks like i have to tell you. So here goes 'I LOVE YOU'. Its not your new found beauty that i am in love with, Its not the cry of an unsatisfied, Its your serene periphery that i am smittened by.
Whats more irresistible is that you being so quiet and still expressive. I can never forget that eye contact that we had which for me lasted a millennium. I still cant forget those tears that trickled down your cheeks. I had had hugged u that very moment in my mind.
One thing though, If the intention of this letter is not satisfied, please don't break the beautiful relationship we have. Its very precious and i would like to treasure it all my life.

Thank you.

Fragility

This is my first...
Its a wonderful sight, the baby is wrapped up in the white towel, eyes try the best to open, the cry is so sweet...... The minute the human is born he is saved by the already grown up world. This continues till death beckons.
Have u ever wondered how fragile that human was and will be till he dies. Or. Have u wondered how powerful he is, protected and helped by the technology, made by the human himself!!
The reason that this contradictory thought seeped into my mind is because of the position have given it. It stands between two regions. Conquered and defeated.
How do I cope Or handle it. The mind runs again. Is it because I assumed my adept Or my loser attitude got the better of me. So is it all about perceiving things. Yes I guess.
So I assume my adept in anything I do? See, there again comes a thin line overconfident|confidence.
Confused I remain in all the layers.........