Sunday, January 18, 2009

Confrontaions that are waiting to happen

As I write down these lines on my blog, my life, over the last five passes by like flashes of photographs. I have wanted to write since then, also did, albeit it was futile. Since I have written two lines now I can pretty confidently say that this is going through.
So what has been happening since my last blog. Life has been super fast and super disapointing. Being brutally frank I call it disappointing, but also being foolishly optimistic those photos (scenes of despair) don't appear too frequently. Work has been hectic and could easily be the reason why I haven't blog since. But what kept me alive and kicking was music. My cousin, passed her ipod to me and ever since this ardent lover of great music has been magn. This looks like one of the best decades of hindi music. Way better than the last two. I have been immersed in kailash kher. I love his voice. There is something about music which is not polished or post processed and his music is tribute to that. I love the rough edges of his music. Tere naina, niharwa, saiyyan are my favourite. Kudos to vinay pathak to choose him for music director, lyricist and singer for his movie Dasvidaniya. The song mumma, alvida and muskura have remained on my top 25 list ever since.
Next fish on my hook is Eddie Vedder, Pearl Jam. I rememeber 'jeremy spoken' as the song that came up once in a while during my shuffle play. But the trip back from nagarhole was last time it appeared as just another song. The minute Su started reeling out the lyrics of the song as it played, I good immersed. There is something about the baritone ish symphony that his voice exudes. Also the completely arbit lyrics of jermy made it more fun to sing along. Also for the uninitiated this song ends with voice modulation that would put atif aslam to shame because not only is Eddie vedder the creator of that sound he is the master of it. I am mine is the other song that features in my top 25. I love the very defined nature of the lyrics.

Other than music, the main track has been ridden with the season of MBA entrance exam. I didn't do well. I am filled with enough shame and guilt and want to keep them in me, till I have an authority to remove them.

Events wise, the ones in bold are sahana's marriage, nagarhole trip, US baays visits, the super amazing smooth light yellow tequila, durga puja, and the gym on the fifth floor of tejas networks.

This new year was fun, I had some spirit in me this time. First time in three years that I am having something to drink on the eve of new years. It was fun, we danced, made cocktails and cut cakes. (~~~contents missing~~~)I have to keep things in me and they are not going to be revealed until I am ultimately sure about it. More than the fear that I claim to have, I fear that the conviction aint there.

I have seen several mind melts over the last 5 months. I guess this is the age. People go through several of this. I feel these are the direction signs of life. Decisions we take during these stages helf us grow and grow out of it. I have seen people mature to fit in, seen people going the puerile way to just to have some fun. I have seen myself developing taste, I have seen myself faking to feel the difference.

I have observed, I have indulged and now I want to grow.